The Netherlands is at the bottom of the list when it comes to paternity leave. This is not only hopelessly outdated and a restriction of men's freedom, but also harmful to society as a whole.

This opinion piece by Marit Holman was originally published in the Volkskrant on March 8, 2025.

"You weren't pregnant, were you?" "You can go find a hobby." This is the kind of comment men around me hear when they take extra maternity leave. It has long been the cultural norm to divide caregiving responsibilities unequally between men and women.

And while this standard is deeply outdated – and no longer in line with the wishes of young families and fathers – we still reinforce it by the unequal distribution of care once a baby is born.

In the Netherlands, women are entitled to sixteen weeks of maternity leave. Maternity leave for the partner is one week, with the possibility of taking five additional weeks of leave with continued payment of 70 percent of the salary. With the latter, the Netherlands dangles somewhere at the bottom of the list of EU and OECD countries. By way of comparison: in Finland, both partners are entitled to 160 days of leave before the child turns 2, and in Spain, this is 16 weeks of 100 percent paid leave.

A majority of young men in the West are therefore in favor of a more equal division of care tasks. But the short paternity leave limits the freedom of men to shape their role as parents equally. Because an equal division of care tasks is not the cultural standard and is not facilitated, this will not happen quickly. We are reinforcing an outdated cultural norm that can be oppressive for men.

Critical period

At the same time, we structurally underestimate the impact that childbirth has on women. This happens more often when women are in distress – think of inserting IUDs without anaesthesia. Primary physical recovery after childbirth takes at least six to eight weeks, but full recovery can take months to a year. The care burden is highest in these first weeks: a newborn child needs 24/7 care and only the woman can breastfeed, resulting in broken nights for her.

Yet in the Netherlands we send partners back to work during this critical first period and force women who have just given birth to function more or less fully, even if their bodies cannot yet handle this. This increases the risk of postpartum depression and can lead to burnout. According to TNO, 29 percent of mothers fall ill within three months of their maternity leave – in 55 percent of cases for longer than 12 weeks.

A partner who can take over tasks that are still too heavy for you is therefore indispensable. Why do we force women to possible overload in this crucial period, while recovery in the long term is actually faster with adequate support?

Job market

Society would also benefit from more parental leave in the long term. In countries with longer paternity leave (such as Scandinavia), you see that fathers structurally take on more care tasks, also in the long term. But when fathers take little leave, an unequal distribution of childcare arises from day one and mothers automatically remain the primary caregivers. This pattern continues in women's careers and leads to inequality in the labor market.

In addition to economic aspects, limited paternity leave is also unfavorable for children. Research shows that fathers who take paternity leave have stronger bonds with their children, are more involved in caring for their child and can be better parents for their children. When there are already older children, the arrival of a brother or sister is a major change. If both parents are at home, they have more space to guide them properly in this.

In short, the limited paternity leave in the Netherlands is not only hopelessly old-fashioned, but also harmful. For children, for women, for the economy, for society as a whole and for men themselves. An involved father is not a luxury, but a necessity. When are we finally going to acknowledge that?